Friends, Family, and Fools
Sin and forgiveness in the Carolina Lowcountry.
“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”
Proverbs 17:17
Birthdays are fun milestones to celebrate when younger; pesky reminders to commiserate when older. Family and close friends are welcome allies in both cases.
Friends
We gathered in Charleston this past weekend to celebrate a friend’s 60th. We, being a collection of good friends who’ve fêted this man through the decades. I wrote about his 50th ten years ago in an essay titled All The Fishes in the Sea, and looking forward to the next happening in 2035. He pulls in a crowd.
Decade birthdays offer a nice span for reconnecting. Enough time passes for real change, but not so much as to trigger amnesia. Who are you again? I have a high school reunion this fall and doubt I’ll recognize anyone. With my hippy days long faded, they’ll be stumped by this bald pate as well. It’s been 40 years since I last communed with the high school coterie. A lot of water under that home-town bridge.
Mike’s circle hales from a kaleidoscope of fascinating backgrounds and beautiful locales, which eases the decision to book the flight and join. Creatives, entrepreneurs, business types of every stripe, lawyers, bar owners and restaurateurs, dreamers, all coming from across the pond, around the country, and up from the Caribbean. A lively gang of rapscallions and bon vivants. Damn good fun.
A lot has been published about the harmful effects of alcohol recently, and a few at the birthday bash were running on no-octane, 0.0. The rest of us were imbibing along a spectrum of one-and-done to mumble-and-stumble. I’m trying to be more conscious about my intake this year and considering longer-term options. But this celebration didn’t seem like the time to hazard sobriety. Madness prevailed as we slow rolled through Charleston’s assortment of rooftop lounges and back street bars over the weekend. Moments like these are best spent with those allergic to incriminating photos and judicious with camera phones. Delete, delete, oh definitely delete.
Family
I stayed with my two sisters in Charlotte during this trip, and one was having a decade birthday of her own. (We’ll not discuss which particular decade.) It’s an easy drive from there to the coast for a weekend bash. A heavy dose of billboard porn keeps you awake on Interstate 26 across South Carolina. Displays for personal injury lawyers (just dial 999-9999!) and soul saving dominate. God bless America and ambulance chasers. My soul was ripe for revival after the weekend bacchanalia, but no legal services were required (somewhat amazingly).
My sisters have beautiful homes in charming towns north of Charlotte. Restaurants and cafes abound, people are friendly in that uniquely Southern way (what will it be, darling?), and the brothers-in-law enjoy their wine. All this to say, I feel spoiled when visiting.
I don’t see Joanie and Sue nearly enough and I appreciate them even more when together. Despite the distance we are a close clan, those 2 and my brother and me. If your life is filled with trusted, engaging friends and loving family, you are blessed. I am blessed. I never take this for granted. Ma vie est belle.
Fools
I can be a fool. I procrastinate, navel gaze, spread gossip, go hermit, waste money, inflate achievements, drink too much, and … what am I missing? Perhaps billboard Jesus will consider a pardon (they’re the rage these days), but that’s a mighty ask. Mercifully, I have friends and family who not only embrace my virtues but forgive my sins, and what more can one celebrate in life than that? Amen.